Something very disturbing has been happening at our house. First of all I have to tell you how it USED to be. Then I will tell you what has happened. Now if I start sounding all legal or something, it is because I am sending this information to my furend Ernie the Attorney. I hope he will consider our case as being worthy of hearing at the Court of Common Fleas.
This is how we have been sleeping for nearly 3 years:
As you can see, Stanley has to move around so he doesn't get a cramp and I am tight against my mom, where I SHOULD be! BUTT mom decided that since her acid reflux was not getting better that she needed to follow a dumb doctor's advice and sleep with a "raised head". What the dog is that anyway? So . . . dad said he can't sleep with a "raised head" so mom said, "Fine, we need a new bed that I can adjust." So they bought a split king adjustable bed with a memory foam mattress.
Me and Stanley were fine with that. Our old bed was a king size memory foam so we thought these changes would NOT affect us. Then we started hearing mom talking about her wanting to "sleep on her side" and then she accused us of "hogging the bed". These words burned my heart! Then when we thought it couldn't get worse she did this:
I spent all night staring at mom BEGGING her to move over so I could cuddle her and hear her heartbeat. She said I could sleep on her other side BUTT that isn't MY side! I tried balancing on the inch she left open on MY side but I couldn't even squeeze in there!
As I'm certain you can tell from this solid evidence we have gathered, this situation cannot go on! We aren't getting any sleep at all! Now I do love my mom but I think you will all agree that this case demands JUSTICE! I just hope Ernie the Attorney finds our case worthy of the Court of Common Fleas!
The Very Tired Murphy & Stanley